The Invitation
This is a story that explores steep learning curves and the vulnerability of school leadership. A fight or flight moment, and the first of many situations where I had to be calm, careful and brave. From here, I would make decisions that could be life-changing for the children and families in our care. This is both a privilege, and your invitation to make a difference.
I looked out of my office window and saw a boy being thrown up the path by his Mum. His hair had been pulled and he wore a heavy, tear-stained scowl of despair on his face. The street was silent, the sun was shining and the school day was quietly underway.
It was my first term of Headship, and it was a moment where I realised that certain situations and flashpoints could often appear. I've always said since then, that the most demanding days are often the ones where your diary is empty. On this occasion, somehow I knew that the only solution would be to do whatever it takes.
'A fight or flight moment, important to some how stay measured, while your mind scrambles to consider the best way to help. There's no time to buy because you know that you have to act, aware that what you do, may not make everyone happy.'
Looking back, and the young man in question was 4 years old. His life at the time was in tatters, and his future unsafe. It had been an insight into a traumatic and troubled life, and it breaks your heart to think that he may only ever assume that this was his fault.
When I'd arrived at this school, I thought that I understood how the world works. My own school was in an area of significant deprivation (Featured in Rita, Sue and Bob Too). I'd worked in special ed as well as a big primary in Hackney. As I settled in, the Ed Psych said to me, 'You know what this is? It's poverty'. I didn't get it. But It made more and more sense to me as the days and years went by. I now think that I understand poverty and how it influences the lives of children and families, even when it's incredibly discreet.
'I was to learn things over the next twelve years, that would change my perceptions and rewire who I was. This is one of the most satisfying and unexpected benefits of headship.'
In this instance, we intervened successfully. What would follow would be a long and intensive process, involving drug-abuse, emergency care and multiple attempted abductions, to ensure stability and life chances.
Over time, we geared ourselves to dig deep and make a bigger difference in school. My first hand experiences influenced how we then recruited, how we systematically ran the school, and our mission statement. I once heard someone say that for those working in the most challenging schools, there's 'no greater calling' - If you're short of ideas for your upcoming inset, pin those words to the board, take a moment to consider what they mean, and take your inspiration from there.
The WIN / WIN
The only real win in this situation is the safety of the pupil. Effective intervention secures experience and confidence, both of which are critical if you are going to succeed when safeguarding your children.
#Win
I learned what to do when confronted with an upsetting situation. We may not be able to prevent flashpoints and problems, but we can become good at dealing with them. I think that this is what makes a good headteacher.
#Win
This was not a one man show. I learned how to work with external agencies and with people in different roles that I had never met before. This conversation created a very supportive working partnership that had the child's safety at heart. This wider network is the only way to access people who know more about this than you do.
